mardi 29 novembre 2016

On sale

That fucking life makes me mad. I have some slenderness on the side of my body, mostly when I do some movements. I think it’s muscular, but I’ve read all the symptoms of most cancers on the Internet and who knows, I may have some cancer and maybe I just have a few months or weeks to live.
Then, my 7 years old boy is having some difficulties at school. He probably has attention deficit and maybe that Asperger shit. He’s been to the shrink 4 times during the last two weeks to understand what’s wrong with his reading problems. Imagine that: a father is a fucking potential Pullitzer price nominee and his son has problems to answer a few questions after reading a short story.  
Isn’t life complicated enough like that without having a cancer and a kid that has problems at school? 
I know that I sometimes look like someone who likes to analyze things. But truth is: life would be so much easier, spending all day on a chair on a beach, eating coconuts and jerking off at the sight of pretty braless polynesian girls. I know that I return a little too often to that animal life, but come on, we all know that it would be real life. Oh my god, please, crash my plane on a tiny isolated tropical island  during my next trip from Quebec City to Toronto.
Speaking about easy things,  today, I received an email from a guy from Australia that offered me to get a free full access to his investing tool for free, if I wrote something about it on this blog. 
I’m on sale: If you want to give me a free copy of your book in exchange of a critic. If you have free diapers for a 5 months baby to offer me. If you want to put me on the board of your company in exchange of lots of money. Or if you want me to write something positive about you even if you're a pedophile. But be aware that I have the bad habit of saying exactly what I think about things, which means that even if I like you at the moment, I may very well start to dislike you in the future. I’d like to be eternally loyal, but sadly, it’s over my capacities.
I usually end up hating everyone and everything.

2 commentaires:

  1. I get emails like that quite often and end up having no energy to reply back. We only have 24 hours a day and sadly after 8 hours of sleeping 16 hours left. Next, using 10-11 hours including commuting from/ to work so 3-4 hours or a lot less free time to be allocated to wife, kids, shitting then what? I get -2 hours a day. Such is a life and no time to waste a second on those bullshit emails.

    RépondreSupprimer
  2. Don't change, as if you could. And I'm sure you don't have cancer, you're too young. It's probably gas.

    And don't worry about the kid. You see, I'm the product of a PhD mother and engineer father who built bridges. I carved out a life as a salesman, had ADD in school and strugged to graduate, now have more $$ than I know what to do with.
    I predict he'll follow a similar path.

    RépondreSupprimer